Everyone’s a fucking poet
An amateur psychologist
Or a professional bloody guru
They’re all into yoga
Or ayurvedic massage
Or goddamn fucking voodoo
All my friends are shrinks
Or go to shrinks
Or think they should
Am I the only one who is
Traditionally, boringly
Prosaically misunderstood?
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Temporary Traffic Lights on Banbury Road
The waves are parted,
Not by a prophet, but a simple switch.
The brutish tide shrinks back,
To tremulous walls of sound, and eyes.
A course abandoned.
Not to the writhing of fish but to the spring,
Which flies unnaturally sweet,
And larks in dusty spirals on the negated road.
Claimed, not reclaimed, for a blackbird’s song.
Annexed by morning
From the silent blackened province of the night
A Spring moment, just long enough to perceive
Then the tiny massless motion breaks the dam,
And juddering, the flow resumes.
Conscious of its presence
It pulses automatic and poisonously slow.
- A lullaby for the Parktown babies
March 2001
Not by a prophet, but a simple switch.
The brutish tide shrinks back,
To tremulous walls of sound, and eyes.
A course abandoned.
Not to the writhing of fish but to the spring,
Which flies unnaturally sweet,
And larks in dusty spirals on the negated road.
Claimed, not reclaimed, for a blackbird’s song.
Annexed by morning
From the silent blackened province of the night
A Spring moment, just long enough to perceive
Then the tiny massless motion breaks the dam,
And juddering, the flow resumes.
Conscious of its presence
It pulses automatic and poisonously slow.
- A lullaby for the Parktown babies
March 2001
Monday, March 26, 2007
Marathon training diary no7: injury
I've been slightly (although inadvertently) smug about my lack of injuries during training. I think I'd put it down to proper planning and equipment. Well now I'm laughing on the other side of my face. I seem to have some kind of problem with my left ankle.
The joint isn't swollen, clicking or grinding. Instead I have a general dull pain around the bottom of my leg (where it joins the foot). I imagine that I have just misjudged a curb or twisted it a little on a rough surface.
However, I only have four weeks to go before the marathon so I am I intend to employ four palliative measures... ARSE!
The joint isn't swollen, clicking or grinding. Instead I have a general dull pain around the bottom of my leg (where it joins the foot). I imagine that I have just misjudged a curb or twisted it a little on a rough surface.
However, I only have four weeks to go before the marathon so I am I intend to employ four palliative measures... ARSE!
- Anti-inflammatories (I've been popping Nurofen)
- Rest (I'm off running for at least two days and reading E.M Forster instead)
- Sub zero temperatures (I've been sat here with frozen peas on my leg all evening)
- Elevation (the frozen peas were on a cushion)
You see, you can lead an elevated intellectual life with frozen peas on your lower limbs - go on GIVE PEAS A CHANCE!
Pullman dining, walking and tweed
My idea was to create a little space for old (and possibly fictional) England in the hustle bustle of modern life; to take people to a romantic setting and let them think romantic thoughts. The weekend took some serious organising (for 26 people) but definitely repaid the effort.
Doing a little active dog-sitting at the end of 2006 I discovered that The North Yorkshire Moors Railway did Pullman dining services along their line from Grosmont to Whitby. My initial thought was a sort of late night Orient/Dracula Express but the time of year and the service pattern made this difficult. Instead I opted for an old-world tweed and frocks affair with a kind of Hound of the Baskervilles hotel theme.
Groups of us from Leeds, Manchester, Leamington Spa, Oxford, Milton Keynes and London converged on the small village of Goathland on Saturday Feb 24th 2007. I'm not sure they knew what had hit them. Everyone had made such a splendid effort either by simply dressing smartly or by going grossly over the top with tweed, plaid and wool in all its forms.
We took the train regular steam service from Goathland station to Grosmont, swapped platforms, and joined the Pullman service. I had specially reserved Car 79. This ornate, Pullman dining car was built in 1928 for the Queen of Scots service and features lovely brass fittings, four seat dining tables and wooden paneling with flower motifs - it is magnificent.
I had been expecting some slightly 'school dinners' food and service but both the staff and the food were fantastic. There aren't many people who can serve soup on a moving steam train these days. The beef was moist and tender, the vegetables beautifully fresh and the wine selection was good.
The scenery outside is lovely and well worth the trip even without the food. We arrived at Pickering after our starter and main course and stepped onto the platform while the engine was uncoupled and turned around.
We took advantage of the break to smoke our pipes and cigars and generally to ponce about in tweed.
Coffees, desserts and further intoxicating beverages were served on the return journey to Grosmont.
Doing a little active dog-sitting at the end of 2006 I discovered that The North Yorkshire Moors Railway did Pullman dining services along their line from Grosmont to Whitby. My initial thought was a sort of late night Orient/Dracula Express but the time of year and the service pattern made this difficult. Instead I opted for an old-world tweed and frocks affair with a kind of Hound of the Baskervilles hotel theme.
Groups of us from Leeds, Manchester, Leamington Spa, Oxford, Milton Keynes and London converged on the small village of Goathland on Saturday Feb 24th 2007. I'm not sure they knew what had hit them. Everyone had made such a splendid effort either by simply dressing smartly or by going grossly over the top with tweed, plaid and wool in all its forms.
We took the train regular steam service from Goathland station to Grosmont, swapped platforms, and joined the Pullman service. I had specially reserved Car 79. This ornate, Pullman dining car was built in 1928 for the Queen of Scots service and features lovely brass fittings, four seat dining tables and wooden paneling with flower motifs - it is magnificent.
I had been expecting some slightly 'school dinners' food and service but both the staff and the food were fantastic. There aren't many people who can serve soup on a moving steam train these days. The beef was moist and tender, the vegetables beautifully fresh and the wine selection was good.
The scenery outside is lovely and well worth the trip even without the food. We arrived at Pickering after our starter and main course and stepped onto the platform while the engine was uncoupled and turned around.
We took advantage of the break to smoke our pipes and cigars and generally to ponce about in tweed.
Coffees, desserts and further intoxicating beverages were served on the return journey to Grosmont.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Marathon training diary no6: long runs
Today I completed the last of four long Sunday runs. Ed, Julia and I went to Hemel Hempstead to take part in one of the Gade Valley Harriers' London Marathon training runs.
Ed picked me up a little late after forgetting her own warning about the clocks going forward and we tumbled out of the car with little time to spare. Fortunately the starters were fairly relaxed about the start time and (having picked Julia up) we all set off with about 300 others on the 20.1 mile course.
We began by running along the canal bank and I found that my rhythm eluded me a little. This was not helped by the long pull out of the valley but with the first hill behind us Julia and I got into our stride. The course was beautiful and deer, larks and kites were spotted on or above the chalky downland. I hoped to recall some of Meredith's The Lark Ascending but failed miserably.
The country reminded me very much of Kent in the pale sunshine and I could easily imagine Norman Barons hunting boar or stag over it.
The marshaling was excellent and the water (and jelly baby) stops were well placed. With the exception of one long hill we found little difficulty in keeping to our 8min 45sec pace target. Indeed we were a good couple of minutes ahead of schedule when we finally finished (again by canal). We had been aiming for 2hours 55mins and finished in 2hours 52mins 5secs
Ed was a good way behind us but she was pleased to have got round. I'm really impressed that having only recently thought ten miles "impossible" she has already done twenty.
Gary Nelmes
Ed picked me up a little late after forgetting her own warning about the clocks going forward and we tumbled out of the car with little time to spare. Fortunately the starters were fairly relaxed about the start time and (having picked Julia up) we all set off with about 300 others on the 20.1 mile course.
We began by running along the canal bank and I found that my rhythm eluded me a little. This was not helped by the long pull out of the valley but with the first hill behind us Julia and I got into our stride. The course was beautiful and deer, larks and kites were spotted on or above the chalky downland. I hoped to recall some of Meredith's The Lark Ascending but failed miserably.
The country reminded me very much of Kent in the pale sunshine and I could easily imagine Norman Barons hunting boar or stag over it.
The marshaling was excellent and the water (and jelly baby) stops were well placed. With the exception of one long hill we found little difficulty in keeping to our 8min 45sec pace target. Indeed we were a good couple of minutes ahead of schedule when we finally finished (again by canal). We had been aiming for 2hours 55mins and finished in 2hours 52mins 5secs
Ed was a good way behind us but she was pleased to have got round. I'm really impressed that having only recently thought ten miles "impossible" she has already done twenty.
Gary Nelmes
Monday, March 19, 2007
Dust : 2nd draft from notes 25/07/05
There are lines where
There were none;
When you were in the North
And young.
Before we stood upon
This weald;
Before the falling
Dust revealed
That the softening of
The summer air
Does by flying
Lay a layer.
Of death upon the
Living things
From whose life
Its flying springs
Yet though it is life
That lays on death
We will not stay one
Beat or breath
And hold our cries
or laughter down
To quieten the
Covering ground.
For if we should how
Would we know
When dust had
taken us below?
For though there are lines
Where there were none
Our lives above
Have scarce begun.
There were none;
When you were in the North
And young.
Before we stood upon
This weald;
Before the falling
Dust revealed
That the softening of
The summer air
Does by flying
Lay a layer.
Of death upon the
Living things
From whose life
Its flying springs
Yet though it is life
That lays on death
We will not stay one
Beat or breath
And hold our cries
or laughter down
To quieten the
Covering ground.
For if we should how
Would we know
When dust had
taken us below?
For though there are lines
Where there were none
Our lives above
Have scarce begun.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
2007 Adidas Silverstone Half Marathon
The weather forecast looked way off the mark when I awoke this morning. It was a little blustery I grant you but nothing to be alarmed about. The 45minute drive between Bletchley and Silverstone was similarly uneventful. The mighty Renault 5 rocked around a little on the A5 but it didn't seem like the end of the world.
The organisation of the race was excellent. It echoed London Marathon's baggage system (with competitors putting their spare clothes in bags to be collected later) and there was no shortage of space and facilities for spectators.
By the time I got to the start it was getting a bit cold and the, previously pristeen blue, sky was dotted with tall clouds of fluffy grey.
I was looking to run 7 minute 30 second miles (a total over 13.1 miles of 1hr, 38 mins and 15 secs). The first 8 miles were dispatched bang on schedule (in 1 hour) but between 8 and 9 miles I had a bit of a wobble. The weather was going through its full repertoir. To add to the blue sky, we had very high winds, rain, snow and hail.
With about three miles to go I could barely open my eyes as we ran into the teeth of the wind and hail. All the mile markers had blown over and it was hard to stick to any sort of even pace.
In the last mile I knew that I would have to kick quite hard to come in under 1:38 and I just didn't have the strength in my legs to bring myself back on schedule. I crossed the line in an official time of 1hr 38mins 29seconds. It was an annoying 14 seconds outside my 'best scenario' time but 3mins 40 seconds better than my personal best.
My friend Edwina Jones also did a PB of 2hrs 7mins 47secs. Well done Edwina!
I'm starting to think that 8 minute miles might just be possible for a marathon.
The organisation of the race was excellent. It echoed London Marathon's baggage system (with competitors putting their spare clothes in bags to be collected later) and there was no shortage of space and facilities for spectators.
By the time I got to the start it was getting a bit cold and the, previously pristeen blue, sky was dotted with tall clouds of fluffy grey.
I was looking to run 7 minute 30 second miles (a total over 13.1 miles of 1hr, 38 mins and 15 secs). The first 8 miles were dispatched bang on schedule (in 1 hour) but between 8 and 9 miles I had a bit of a wobble. The weather was going through its full repertoir. To add to the blue sky, we had very high winds, rain, snow and hail.
With about three miles to go I could barely open my eyes as we ran into the teeth of the wind and hail. All the mile markers had blown over and it was hard to stick to any sort of even pace.
In the last mile I knew that I would have to kick quite hard to come in under 1:38 and I just didn't have the strength in my legs to bring myself back on schedule. I crossed the line in an official time of 1hr 38mins 29seconds. It was an annoying 14 seconds outside my 'best scenario' time but 3mins 40 seconds better than my personal best.
My friend Edwina Jones also did a PB of 2hrs 7mins 47secs. Well done Edwina!
I'm starting to think that 8 minute miles might just be possible for a marathon.
Saturday, March 17, 2007
Preparing for the Silverstone Half
I'm feeling a little stiff and sore ahead of the Silverstone Half. My right calf will need to be well stretched and warmed up to avoid injuries. The weather forecast is also pretty awful for tomorrow (end-of-the-world stuff).
If I do get to the start line tomorrow I'll be looking to push my PB a little. I imagine that 7min 30sec miles are within my capabilities but anything better than 1hr 42:09 will do me just fine. It would be good to know that I can run without Julia as a pace-buddy.
If I wake up to snow or horizontal rain i'll be staying home .....brrrrrr.
I've been wondering about going into sports massage. Being based part time in Oxford I thought that I might train with Pulse Training.
If I do get to the start line tomorrow I'll be looking to push my PB a little. I imagine that 7min 30sec miles are within my capabilities but anything better than 1hr 42:09 will do me just fine. It would be good to know that I can run without Julia as a pace-buddy.
If I wake up to snow or horizontal rain i'll be staying home .....brrrrrr.
I've been wondering about going into sports massage. Being based part time in Oxford I thought that I might train with Pulse Training.
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Marathon training diary no5: training tips
I've done marathons before, one in 1999 and one in 2000. I put lots of effort in before the races but there wasn't much thought behind my preperation; and there was certainly no science. Seven years later I like to think that I am also seven years smarter.
My approach to marathon running in the early days was to run slightly further every week until I was within spitting distance of 26.2 miles. I think I ran about 22miles a couple of weeks before the event then gradually eased off, quit the booze, and went all monastic.
This approach does build stamina and it certainly has the effect of prepairing you mentally to get round the course. The problem lies in the physical, mental and emotional fatigue which piles up over the months of training. It becomes harder and harder to get out of the chair, injuries seem to be a constant problem and lifting the pace seems very difficult.
Here are my tips for more enjoyable training
Join a running club
Most urban areas have a nice approachable road running club. If you can run 9min 30sec miles you can almost certainly find a good enjoyable group to run with.
Find yourself a training partner (or partners)
It could be a friend or a colleague at work or a family member. It doesn't have to be an exclusive relationship but a regular running buddy will make your runs a pleasure. Try and help your partner rather than push them (I think this probably applies particularly to men). Even if they seem a bit too slow or a bit too fast on any given mile you'll inevitably run faster together.
Mix it up a bit
Simply running at a flat pace for a long time can prepare you to 'endure' in a race but it is no fun. Choose different routes. Do some run/walk or slow/fast intervals. Try hill training; jogging down a hill at a comfortable pace then racing up it for 90 seconds as fast as possible.
Have a chat
Train at a pace where you can maintain a (slightly breathless) conversation. Save the red faced gasping for your interval sessions.
Use a schedule
Runnersworld and loads of other sites have useful schedules with lots of variety. It is fun to track your progress against where you want to be.
Remember to stretch
The jury is out on pre-exercise stretching. I do a little gentle stretching before I run but it is of disputed value. Stretching afterwards (quads, achilles, back and hamstrings) is really helping me. Don't bounce on your tendon; just stretch and hold for 30 seconds or so in each position.
Cross train
A little cycling or swimming can balance out your running training and improve your endurance. Remember though; swimming and cycling use very different muscles and you can't prepare for a marathon unless you do the miles.
Use a treadmill
Everyone knows that treadmills are boring but they can be an excellent way of doing interval training. On the road you can lie to yourself about speed and distance. There is no hiding from the numbers on a treadmill.
Try racing
Entering a 10km race or a half marathon is a great experience in itself; it gives you an idea of how athletics events work and it will give you a little push to try harder.
Don't worry about your times: you are already a demigod
There are those of us who try to run marathons and then there are those who don't. However slow you are, if you try, you have more in common with the great champions than you do with the couch potatoes.
My approach to marathon running in the early days was to run slightly further every week until I was within spitting distance of 26.2 miles. I think I ran about 22miles a couple of weeks before the event then gradually eased off, quit the booze, and went all monastic.
This approach does build stamina and it certainly has the effect of prepairing you mentally to get round the course. The problem lies in the physical, mental and emotional fatigue which piles up over the months of training. It becomes harder and harder to get out of the chair, injuries seem to be a constant problem and lifting the pace seems very difficult.
Here are my tips for more enjoyable training
Join a running club
Most urban areas have a nice approachable road running club. If you can run 9min 30sec miles you can almost certainly find a good enjoyable group to run with.
Find yourself a training partner (or partners)
It could be a friend or a colleague at work or a family member. It doesn't have to be an exclusive relationship but a regular running buddy will make your runs a pleasure. Try and help your partner rather than push them (I think this probably applies particularly to men). Even if they seem a bit too slow or a bit too fast on any given mile you'll inevitably run faster together.
Mix it up a bit
Simply running at a flat pace for a long time can prepare you to 'endure' in a race but it is no fun. Choose different routes. Do some run/walk or slow/fast intervals. Try hill training; jogging down a hill at a comfortable pace then racing up it for 90 seconds as fast as possible.
Have a chat
Train at a pace where you can maintain a (slightly breathless) conversation. Save the red faced gasping for your interval sessions.
Use a schedule
Runnersworld and loads of other sites have useful schedules with lots of variety. It is fun to track your progress against where you want to be.
Remember to stretch
The jury is out on pre-exercise stretching. I do a little gentle stretching before I run but it is of disputed value. Stretching afterwards (quads, achilles, back and hamstrings) is really helping me. Don't bounce on your tendon; just stretch and hold for 30 seconds or so in each position.
Cross train
A little cycling or swimming can balance out your running training and improve your endurance. Remember though; swimming and cycling use very different muscles and you can't prepare for a marathon unless you do the miles.
Use a treadmill
Everyone knows that treadmills are boring but they can be an excellent way of doing interval training. On the road you can lie to yourself about speed and distance. There is no hiding from the numbers on a treadmill.
Try racing
Entering a 10km race or a half marathon is a great experience in itself; it gives you an idea of how athletics events work and it will give you a little push to try harder.
Don't worry about your times: you are already a demigod
There are those of us who try to run marathons and then there are those who don't. However slow you are, if you try, you have more in common with the great champions than you do with the couch potatoes.
Monday, March 12, 2007
Marathon training diary no4: MK Half (11:03:07)
Julia, Ed and I took the opportunity to do MK Half as it starts and finishes on The Open University campus and uses some routes familiar to us on our regular runs at the OU and with Marshall Milton Keynes AC.
It was a beautiful sunny spring day with a brisk breeze and I was looking to run flat 8 minutes miles (3hr 30min marathon pace). We arrived at the back of a large start confident that our timing chips would give us a true time despite the delay crossing the start.
Julia and I ran a lovely controlled race. When we started to get too far ahead of our target time we slowed things down. The course was beautiful and really showed MK's parks off to their best.
I came in with Julia in a creditable 1hr 42 09 and Ed smashed her 2hr 15 target. The only downer on the day was that the timing chips didn't record the start so we had times from 'the gun'. This makes us look 3 minutes slower than we were - very annoying.
Still, 3hr 30pace is what we were aiming for and is exactly what we did. Julia has now taken a minute per mile per year off her MK time for three years running - very impressive.
Sue and Emma also improved our time by at least 30secs with some tactical shrieking.
It was a beautiful sunny spring day with a brisk breeze and I was looking to run flat 8 minutes miles (3hr 30min marathon pace). We arrived at the back of a large start confident that our timing chips would give us a true time despite the delay crossing the start.
Julia and I ran a lovely controlled race. When we started to get too far ahead of our target time we slowed things down. The course was beautiful and really showed MK's parks off to their best.
I came in with Julia in a creditable 1hr 42 09 and Ed smashed her 2hr 15 target. The only downer on the day was that the timing chips didn't record the start so we had times from 'the gun'. This makes us look 3 minutes slower than we were - very annoying.
Still, 3hr 30pace is what we were aiming for and is exactly what we did. Julia has now taken a minute per mile per year off her MK time for three years running - very impressive.
Sue and Emma also improved our time by at least 30secs with some tactical shrieking.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Marathon training diary no3: one month to go
Paris marathon is a little over a month away. My target is to complete the course in between 3hrs 30 and 3hrs 45. This weekend's MK half marathon will be the first test of that goal. Julia Brennan and I are hoping to run flat 8 minute miles for the full 13.1 miles and to come in around 1hr 44mins.
So far training has been going relatively well. I've been following a Runners World schedule which includes interval training for speed, distance training for endurance and race-pace training for errrm, well pace I suppose.
Julia has been a tremendous help because (coincidentally) we seem to run at more or less the same speed, pushing each other a little bit further every time. Emma, Sue and Ed have also been brilliant training partners for lunchtime runs.
As I get closer to the race date the distances required become greater and more and more of my time is being absorbed by training. Fortunately, the spring is also arriving and running in the park land around The Open University is becoming an increasing pleasure.
Yesterday's OU relay was quite heartening. I managed 1.1miles in 6mins 41secs without too much difficulty. There was certainly more in the tank. Last weekend I also ran an easy 14 miles and a frantic 5 miles (cross country) so I am not too worried by the distance.
Finding time to eat properly is sometimes a problem (especially at lunchtime) but the speed, the endurance and the love of running are all coming back.
So far training has been going relatively well. I've been following a Runners World schedule which includes interval training for speed, distance training for endurance and race-pace training for errrm, well pace I suppose.
Julia has been a tremendous help because (coincidentally) we seem to run at more or less the same speed, pushing each other a little bit further every time. Emma, Sue and Ed have also been brilliant training partners for lunchtime runs.
As I get closer to the race date the distances required become greater and more and more of my time is being absorbed by training. Fortunately, the spring is also arriving and running in the park land around The Open University is becoming an increasing pleasure.
Yesterday's OU relay was quite heartening. I managed 1.1miles in 6mins 41secs without too much difficulty. There was certainly more in the tank. Last weekend I also ran an easy 14 miles and a frantic 5 miles (cross country) so I am not too worried by the distance.
Finding time to eat properly is sometimes a problem (especially at lunchtime) but the speed, the endurance and the love of running are all coming back.
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